NOTE – this blog post even has some background music [ These Foolish Things – Chet Baker ] to go along with it. So, if you’ve got the sound turned “on”, you might want to click on the above link to listen along while you continue reading.
It had all started in the raspberry patch one morning as I was harvesting the first of the season’s raspberry crop. And during some “across-the-fence” visiting with neighbors, Penny and Marilyn, I happened to mention that it was the first anniversary of my mom’s death.
As I worked my way through the tangle of brambles, enjoying the luscious sweet taste on my lips as I sampled a few of the plump-ripe berries, I remembered how mom would drop everything when presented with a bowl of fresh-picked raspberries. She’d sit quietly, eating them one-by-one, savoring each one while dutifully emptying the bowl of its delights.
As I returned inside, I began to notice even more “foolish” things that daily serve to remind me of mom’s continuing presence in my life:
- The glass cruet that mom kept filled with apple cider vinegar. I remember we poured it on sliced, fresh tomatoes in the summer-time and cooked, frozen spinach in the winter-time. I still love the taste of apple cider vinegar – often enjoying a spoonful of Bragg’s raw, organic vinegar in a glass of water.
- Speaking of good things to drink, how about the beer mug that mom kept cold and ready in the refrigerator’s produce bin? How mom loved her beer – especially if it included a bowl of peanuts!
- And, with the beer, would come mom’s generous laugh. Oh, how I loved her laugh – so full and rich and filled with life. She knew how important laughter is in our lives. And I keep her little plaque in my kitchen window to remind me that “a giggle a day keeps the glums away.”
- Yet, for those days when the glums came anyway (whether for her or for someone else) there were always lots of little things around that could bring a giggle or two – or maybe even just a smile. For example, there was always at least one copy of the Reader’s Digest around out in the studio – from where you could often hear one of us kids guffawing as we’d read through the jokes and anecdotes. And as mom grew older, one of my favorite rituals included cranking the nose on the clown music box to make it begin to play “Send in the Clowns.” Looking back, I’m not at all sure anymore whether that ritual ever made her actually “smile” [other than with a smile of toleration for my own silly ritual!]. But I did learn that all it really took to gladden her heart and light up her face with her soul-melting smile was to look up from her chair and see one of her kids or grandkids standing in the doorway of her room.
- She was rightfully proud of the family she had grown–or at least I hope we’ve done her proud. As we were growing up, we’d celebrate our birthdays with a cake that she had made, using an iridescent glass plate on which to display it. It wasn’t until years later that I discovered that she had an entire set of those plates, along with a matching serving bowl in the cupboard.
- Besides growing people, mom also grew plants–mostly the in-the-house type, like African violets or philodendron or English ivy. And, for a long time (at least when I was a little girl), there were voluptuous sweet potato vines growing in her two matching Roseville “pinecone” vases. A couple of weeks ago, after “baby-sitting” a neighbor’s vine, I decided to give it a try. So far, no roots, but hopes still abound.
So many sweet memories. Isn’t it amazing how such simple things can stir up so many memories?
I appreciate being able to share some of my memories and stories with you – and would love to hear some of yours.
So, what are some of the simple, foolish things in YOUR surroundings that bring back sweet memories of loved ones?
Feel free to leave a comment below, or send me an email.
Matthew says
Miss her so much. My only comfort is knowing she’s without pain and in the company of grandpa, her folks, and siblings. I flew out to Wooster, OH today, and will buzz up to Cuyahoga County Airport tomorrow, then pay her a visit at All Souls.
Thanks for sharing!
mjk
Mary Elaine Kiener, RN, PhD says
Thanks, Matt – maybe you could find a spare flower to put on her grave…..she would always bring something from the garden for Grandpa – so I bet she’d like one, too!
Renee says
Thanks for sharing some of your memories, Mary Elaine. Your mom sounds like a very special lady.
Rasberries bring back memories for me also,I even started (can’t remember if I finished!) a poem about that one time. My grandmother was a poor peasant from Russia, spoke poor English and was mostly housebound. She grew a couple of unproductive rasberry plants in her backyard and would pick rasberries and save them for me, her first grandchild, in a small Kraft cheese jar to give me on Sunday visits. I always felt I was her favorite grandchild or,at least, very special! I have always loved rasberries!
Mary Elaine Kiener, RN, PhD says
Renee – what a LOVELY memory. Thanks so much for sharing! And I understand that UUCGL is having another poetry Sunday later this month [I don’t know whether they’re still looking for poems…..]
The next time you’re here at ASK ME House, I’d love to share with you a taste of Alex’s special “raspberry cordial” – that he learned how to make from his grandmother (I think).